WB 16Feb

What a stressful week this has been! I was so close to having a nervous breakdown with all the things that I had to complete.

WORK – My tasks at work would’ve gone smoothly if not for the scheduler who misinterpreted the email that my manager sent her 2 weeks before. I mean, if anything in the message is unclear, surely, it wouldn’t take anyone a couple of minutes to revert and ask if they understood the email correctly, right? So what happened was she scheduled ALL of the focus teammates to attend the same communication training 3 times this week. I guess, common sense didn’t kick in. When I asked her about it, she simply replied, “Cancel mo na lang yung iba. Real-time pull out ka na lang.” Seriously?! Isn’t she aware of how hard it is to pull out teammates from production on the day itself?! That’s the reason why we requested to have all the sessions plotted 2 weeks ago in the first place. I don’t want to go around the floor, chasing everyone, getting permission from managers, workforce, etc. It’s too much work. Work smarter, not harder, you know.

In the end, I had no choice, but to cancel all the remaining sessions and conduct communication huddles instead, since I found out that I will need to handle a different team as my current focus teammates will have to undergo another conversion class for a week and eventually move to a new LOB. BPO life at its finest!

POSSIBLE NEW JOB – This caused most of my stress! I was given the opportunity to apply for a post in a communication advisory firm in Makati. Laura, the HR manager interviewed me last week and I was hoping to be personally interviewed by the Service Delivery manager last Monday but it wasn’t possible. I was then scheduled last Thursday at 10:30AM.

Four days from judgment day, Laura sent me an email with the task that I need to submit before my scheduled interview. After reading the task, I was a wreck! Learning from school and work collided! Nothing’s making sense. I AM SO DOOMED! But I can’t give up. Someone recommended me and I’m not going to disappoint her just because my head is a melting pot of information mess. This can’t happen.

I even attended the Ash Wednesday mass to calm me down and ask for guidance and wisdom to finish the task. I had to – I was all over the place.

At the last minute, my brain was on a roll. I finished the task. It wasn’t a masterpiece, but I know there’s potential. A little loose on the approach, but it was evident that there’s understanding.

I arrived at the office 50 minutes before my scheduled interview – which means no one was still in the office – I had to wait at the dark corridor, by the elevators. It was scary, but I was too nervous to pay attention to my own fears. In the last 6 months, I’ve had my share of rejections. I’ve told myself many times before when I don’t get the job, something better is in store for me. I don’t wait by the phone, but I know that I was almost breathless every time I get a text message or a call from an unknown number or when I refresh my email, hoping to hear from one of the companies I applied for. It came to a point when I started to question what I can do and where I am going with my life.

Back to the office of the communication advisory firm, the HR manager finally arrived. I think I scared the life out of her when she got out of the elevator – I don’t think she was used to seeing someone by the corridor at that time. I apologized. I hoped that I didn’t screw up my chances. (crossed fingers…)

Still 30 minutes away from my interview, I waited nervously and started thinking about the possibility of joining this company. For the longest time, I’ve always been the welcoming party – making the new girl/guy feel welcomed and comfortable, taking care of their permissions, forwarding emails, report formats and formulas, etc. If all things work out, I will be the NEW GIRL who needs to learn everything in the shortest period of time and catch up with everyone and prove to them that they made the right decision in hiring me. I’m tired with all the thinking – whoops, there’s no room for negative thoughts – happy hormones come to me… if it’s meant to be, it’ll be. But I really want this! Arrgh!

I finally got called to a small office. Ben, the SD manager welcomed me with a firm handshake and assured me that it’ll be an informal type of interview (but I didn’t believe him.) The view from the office was amazing, but it wasn’t the time to appreciate the view. I just wanted to survive the moment, the hour, the interview. I just want to make the cut. If only I could beg… LOL.

I thought I did well. I was able to answer all of his questions. I was candid and conversational –displayed a bit of my lovable (CHOS!) sense of humour here and there. Laying almost 9 years’ worth of experience and knowledge on the table, I hoped that they’ll see that I will be a great addition to the team. After an hour and a half, it was over. I’m leaving it to God.

The same day, my phone showed a list of missed calls from Ally. My heart sank. Still, I sent her a casual message explaining why I wasn’t able to take her call. I left my phone at home since my shift will end at 3AM the next day.

When I came home after my shift, I immediately checked my phone, hoping that Ally responded to my text message, revealing her reason for calling me. Unfortunately, my phone again displayed another series of missed calls from her. I sent her another message and decided to sleep for a couple of hours before working on my homework. The rollercoaster ride of emotions I’ve had this week is starting to take a toll on my body.

When I woke up, I checked my phone and finally, she replied. To my disappointment, she only said “Text me when you’re free.” I couldn’t take it anymore; I told her that I was then. I waited for 30 minutes and she still hasn’t called. I sent her another text message saying she may have not received my previous message. To that, she replied that she would in 30 minutes.

Still tired, I decided to have food delivered. This waiting game is agony. I thought to myself, “you have low emotional intelligence, Jen.” LOL.

Finally, Ally called and as soon as I said “Hello”, she… (details will be in another post).

Now, I need to work on my homework.

SCHOOL – My professor in Educational Management gave us an assignment on Curriculum and Curriculum Design. The pain about his assignments is his resources. You just can’t seem to find them on the web.

Good thing, it’s different this time. The information is accessible and the format of his questions is much clearer and easier to organize. Still, I spent almost 3 hours researching, outlining and organizing the details. I decided to print everything the next day before I go to school.

I’m glad this week is over. My sleep was deep and dreamless. It was perfect. I needed more.

Spotify playlist: Soft Pop Hits (Highly recommended!)

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